Sivin Kit’s Garden

Archive for the ‘Random Thoughts’ Category

The main reason I’ve been missing is because I’m writing my Masters of Theology Thesis.  It’s hard work, and for now it consumes my waking and my dreaming.  But since it’s on Trinitarian Theology, at least I can say I’ve been seriously meditating on God, and have not lost my mind yet!

It’s been good but it’s been tough too.  The kids are patient, my wife is extra amazing and tolerant.  I had to work out at least three writing venues within the house.  I think the final one with a round table will be where I’m quarantined during this Chinese New Year.

1000 thousand apologies if I don’t show up for gatherings this year.  I have a deadline to keep.  But after the first draft is out I think I will revert to more human activity.

Lots of other side projects have come to mind.  But the main value of this exercise has been disciplining my mind from wandering. Focus has always been a challenge for me. At least, when it comes to writing.  In this case academic writing.

I was surprised at some spiritually energizing moments here and and there especially when something just pops up and surprises me or when convergence occurs.

I’m just happy there aren’t any “new” places of worship vandalized again after a horrible first two weeks in January.  There were many redemptive moments.  But seriously, for this kind of assault on religious communities to happen in Malaysia. Tragic and sad

Google Buzz was a minor distraction just when I got my Facebook and Twitter distractions in check.

To eat out or eat at home now that is the question.

The weather is terribly hot!

Nice to see two of the kids having a great nap.  And big bro Gareth at ease.

Finished reading more Miroslav Volf stuff.  Will print more and devour them for tonight and then back to more writing.

Of course, a needed skype appointment will be a welcome interruption. Life is ultimately about relationships with people more than ideas.  And even if I’m working through ideas, they first came from people.  so full cycle.

Okay.  At least I managed to do a blog post.

CHRISTIAN FEDERATION OF MALAYSIA

(PERSEKUTUAN KRISTIAN MALAYSIA)

27th January 2010

CFM OUTRAGED BY CONTINUED VIOLATION OF SACRED PLACES

The Christian Federation of Malaysia is outraged that the violation of places of worship continues unabated as has happened this morning to two mosques along Jalan Klang Lama in Petaling Jaya.

We are angry that there are some who want to foment enmity and strife among Malaysians for political mileage or for mischief.    

These violent acts can divide Malaysians and so we call on all citizens not to fall into such a trap.  
We believe that the police will bring swiftly to justice the perpetrators who have done these evil intentioned acts. 

Let us be vigilant against all suspicious activities around all our places of worship and report such to the police. 

As Christians we continue to pray for the peace and well-being of our nation in these troubled moments.

Bishop Ng Moon Hing
Chairman and the Executive Committee
Christian Federation of Malaysia

The song How Many Kings still ringing in my ears.

I missed every big Christmas production this year.  Almost went for one yesterday, but somehow the physical body needed rest, thus landed up being at home reading stories to Ewan and Elysia.

I guess, I will only REALLY start my rest tomorrow.  Then again, it’s a rest which includes writing a theology academic paper

Heading to the margins was an important part of the finale. How life has changed for me these past years.  Who would have imagined this would be my path?

Listening to carols sung in a foreign tongue brought me into another world. Then when I heard “He leadeth me”, something in me was moved.  I couldn’t understand it but I felt the Spirit move.

The last Sunday for the year ended on a significant sobering note.

Suddenly, the few things I need to wrap up for the year surged into my mind. I’ll need to settle them by 31 December.

First, settle some external  “stuff” this morning, and tonight. One more personal, another more public.  Both need a steady heart and a solid mind.

Looking forward for the afternoon. Perhaps a haircut today? Not much left . maybe a trim? Freshen up for the new year.

Short random thought post for today.  In winding down mode.

This is a great picture with some great guys with fitting t-shirts.

Confession: I know I haven’t been blogging much. The reason is simple. I’ve been tweeting Plus, I have been doing more writing academically for my Master’s papers. And the reality is I’ve been quite involved in more speaking, coordinating, and doing then writing

I’m reading for some coffee now.

The coffee is good.

I’m looking forward to reengage back into writing the final paper and finishing off the MTheol.

Kids are growing fast.  Everyone of them.

2009 has been another more than eventful year with quite a number of memorable experiences.

I need to update my Facebook photo albums.

Looking forward to the arrival of the book on Trinity I ordered.

The interaction between different representatives from a variety of religions will be most interesting.  At least one civil society point of view will chip in!

It will be great to have one more event at the Father’s house, Bangsar.  I miss our original home tremendously.

2010 will be another fascinating year.

I don’t know the details but based on where I’m heading it will lack no boredom!

As for the life of blogging, let’s see what will happen.

The breeze is nice. The beach is so so. All in all it’s nice to get away from busy Kuala Lumpur.

The food last night at Ye Lin’s was awesome.  Looks like we might land up there again tonight.

One thing I enjoyed observing was the kids playing with the sand on the beach.  Elysia as always writing names of people she cares for . lovely to see my name there

Ewan really enjoyed strolling along the beach, and even sitting on a rock and a tree branch for some photos.

Gareth having loads of fun with his cousins.

Holidays are meant for kids!

For me, I’m glad I managed to plot a little more HOPE last night. It’s hard to do that these days, but we press on.

Looking forward to continue reading on Trinitarian Theology later.

. and take a nap perhaps in between the pages.  Not because it’s boring, but it’s demanding.

I liked the drive to Lumut yesterday.  Passed by Setiawan.  Had some fond memories there speaking at the Methodist TRAC conference YouthQuake years ago. 

The rush to the jetty was quite an adventure. The boat ride was wonderful. so was the father-daughter bonding time.

Had some good extra glue-ing with Ewan so far.  Looking forward for a little bit more with Gareth before we go back.  Gareth’s camera skills have been really good with my older Canon A70.  What’s interests me is more of what interests him

Holidays are meant for kids . and adults get a chance to join in the fun.

. and find some meaning in what’s important again.

we’re simply too forgetful.

I enjoy blogging but I haven’t blogged for quite a while. I’ve tried to keep things going by posting videos. But it doesn’t mean I haven’t been writing.

In fact, I’ve completed my 4th paper for my Master’s in theology module work.  So I can give myself a pat on the back.  Take a deep breath and starting writing another few more papers.

That’s life. Part of it.

Then there’s the getting into the new role of being the Dean of the Kuala Lumpur District for the Lutheran Church in Malaysia and Singapore.  First thing I should do tomorrow is to settle some dates for meetings. Kyrie Eleison.

I’m still the pastor of Bangsar Lutheran Church by the way!

And we’ve been going through major changes as well.  Nice to see the children’s ministry start Godly Play again.  We started Sunday Bible studies last week too and also Pastor Naomi has jump started the Chinese worship gathering.  So that’s some new stuff coming up. 

I don’t mind newness.  It’s always refreshing.

But then change also takes it’s demand on you – overall especially physically and emotionally.  So, I fell sick on Monday after half a day of Mission Consultation with our Mission partners.  My contribution? I think the theme “Friends in God’s Mission” stuck after I shared the morning opening devotion. That felt good.

Father of three kids and husband of one. That’s how I like to introduce myself. It’s cute but seriously it’s more to remind me of my primary responsibility apart from being a child of God. It’s not easy on the family when they have a crazy Dad and short attention span husband like me.

Hey . getting back to writing like a human being is nice.  No footnotes mom!

Well, there’s a lot which I haven’t had a chance to blog about yet.  Loads of pictures. tons of experiences.  And bits and pieces of second thoughts here and there.

I guess, what drew me back was the fact that someone who literally “served” me and this blog will be delegating this responsibility.  We’ve been together since day 1 of this garden. So, it’s a strange feeling to know of this particular change.

But then change is part and parcel of life. Some good, some not so good. But it’s going to be there.

I’m going get some Ribena and relax!

My coffee is finishing soon.  It’s not Ipoh white coffee.

The picture above has stuck in my mind since I arrived in Ipoh 2 days ago. I think it speaks a million.

It’s obvious that whatever one may do to the people on the outside, it what’s on the inside that matters and tells you more about what’s really going on – what the people really wants.

I’ve come to the conclusion I need to strengthen on theology of sin.  While so often we give a benefit of a doubt to people whom we are supposed to trust and respect, but it’s better to still have a tinge of caution.

It’s important to know who we are, what we stand for, and what we are called to be and do.  Too many variables are outside of our control, and often what happens to us really has nothing to do with us.  It’s likely to have more to do with the ones calling the shots.

The moment “God” is brought in to close down a debate, it shows that we’ve crossed the line between of being used by him and using him.  Lord have mercy.

When we “abstain” from making a decision, the effect is that we empower those who say “No!”.  It’s our right to do so, but we still need to bear the consequences of the decision of “non-decision”. We can empathize with the struggle of those who “sit on the fence” – it’s not easy when we are forced to make a tough choice, but especially for those in leadership – we have no choice but to face hard options all the time.

I do believe in the "hidden” work of God is some times more visible than others.  In my limited experience, reflecting upon it on hind sight is the healthier way to speak about it.  Explaining away an immediate scenario is premature.

Is God’s will “whatever will be will be”? or is God’s will about truth, justice, righteousness, peace, reconciliation, etc. rather than a deterministic posture?

The fact of the buzz outside the formal settings is a reality.  As human beings we are people in community, and it’s only natural to engage in mutual reflection non-formally. The challenge is whether one will still show courage and articulate the results of those conversations and take ownership of those views.

There are times when we are caught between a rock and a hard place and speak on behalf of others.  Speaking up for and on behalf of the weak, the voiceless, and the marginalized is to be applauded. But when those in power, and do have a voice expects us to speak on their behalf – then it’s a troubling and makes one pause and wonder . what’s going on here?

Trust is a precious commodity in all relationships.  When it’s broken, it’s almost impossible to mend it. Almost impossible, not impossible.  We are not finished yet ..

Courage is not about volume.  But it’s cowardice when we expect someone else (or worse ask someone else) to speak up for us, when we have the voice to speak up for ourselves.

Many will debate about whether truth is absolute or relative, lots of people when asked will say they believe in absolute truth.  The test is not in the articulation or the sophistication of epistemological position.  The test is when one is confronted in situations when the demand for truth telling is apparent. I suppose all of us don’t want to be liars (okay, most of us ), but a lot of us will find it hard to state things as it is.

Truth telling, courage and trust . . .  these three have been on my mind with intensity for 48hours.

My coffee is finished.  Looks like my random thoughts have finished too.

I’ve resigned from work in order to move from one job to another.  Yesterday, was the first time I’ve resigned from a position. It doesn’t feel good.  But I know it’s right.

BTW, don’t read too much into the random thoughts . they are random thoughts!

There are real contexts for the thoughts but everything above is jumbled up.  It’s been a while since I’ve done a “random thoughts” post!

It was simple fun. Inexpensive. A little competition and some excitement.

Wow. I noticed that I haven’t blogged as intensely as I used to.  I wonder whether it’s because of Twitter or maybe I’m just more preoccupied lately.

As one gets older I wonder whether decisiveness is seen as impatience.  Or maybe it’s because after so many hard knocks, we just don’t want to waste time.

Ewan is growing fast and I love watching him walk around.  The new found mobility is such a view to watch.

Of course, his vocabulary is increasing by the day, slowly and steadily.  I think I heard a clear “Papa” during dinner. The rest is usually “rambling in tongues”!

Had a full day of two meetings and sat through one demo today.  There is a feeling of accomplishment, and yet it’s tiring.  Good meetings overall and necessary.

Rebooting my GTD system has been good.  I was distracted by the “cracked” iphone a kind soul gave to me I wonder when I will fully switch to using a Mac. My route seems to be from the other way round – iPod, iphone .. and ?

I still believe nothing beats the Hipster PDA. I love it. 

Wow, I just realized today the last 5 days I have been eating a lot of Chicken and roast pork rice.  Almost alternate days.  I need a change.

Hmm . getting back into a rhythm of blogging isn’t that easy. I wonder why?

Oh yes, I need to get back to my 30 Day Improving my blog challenge.  Like all things, I was distracted.

This is the first time I’m staying in Room No. 5 at the Lutheran Mission Bungalow. It’s nice.  I like the table I’m using now facing the garden.  And the weather especially after the rain, is especially refreshing for my need

The main purpose for me to be here is actually not rest and relaxation.  I was assigned four sessions at Camp Cameron organized by the Fellowship of Evangelical Students. The camp is only for tertiary students. They are into their third week at the Lutheran Lake view Campsite about 30minutes drive from where I am now.

Managed two sessions this morning. I was wondering whether it’s the excitement of being able to share after being immobilized for quite a few days (and missing the Sunday sermon) or the overdose of coffee, that I spoke a little too fast in session one. I made the necessary adjustment in session two with better pacing I guess.

It’s a little challenging to “parachute” in for a camp where the campers have spent so much time together, gone through quite a number of sessions before me (and I wasn’t around to hear what was said in detail), but I think after today I have got a better sense of where everyone is at and what level of “digestion” they are at.

The highlight for me of course, was the conversations over lunch at one of the chalets.  The questions and interaction helped include me faster into the “community” environment.

Of course, returning to stay in the Lutheran Mission Bungalow was my choice.  Somehow, I had the gut feeling I needed some time alone.  Not just to regenerate, but also to slow down a little. So, while the mornings until lunch are mainly sessions and conversations with people. The afternoons and nights are all on my own.  Tomorrow, there is a full day break.  Normally, I prefer everything to be done in a row.  But I guess the schedule also allowed me a pause before the last one.

The air is clearing me up well. I managed to get some needed 40 winks. The breathing is slightly slower. Looking forward for a simple dinner alone. I do miss the kids and May Chin. It would have been great if they were here.  But then again, school is still on.

It’s noteworthy that we’re approaching the mid year. So, this was a  planned speaking engagement mixed with an unplanned mid year mini-break. True solitude for a change. Solitude where it’s not just time with myself, but time with my creator, redeemer and life-giver. I’m grateful.

I really liked the “Rebooted” Star Trek Movie. No complaints.

Made me wonder how would the Church in Malaysia look like if we “rebooted” ourselves with the same energy and focus that went into this movie.

Of course, made me wonder how would the government, various institutions and society in Malaysia would look like if the whole system went for a much needed “reboot”. Literally, we need more than a kick?

One meeting was rescheduled this morning.  That felt good. Another meeting opened up this afternoon before another appointment which both are cool. One is basic, another is beyond.

I noticed after watching Fringe that J.J Abrams seems to like certain fonts. I blame this sensitivity and all things in the media to my father. When I was young, he was always talking about them in the car when we pass a billboard.  Strange how our origin stories affect us so much

I giggled when a church member warned me from using Star Trek in my upcoming sermons Well, after the “rebooted” Battlestar Galactica series. Where else will I get my entertainment inspirations? Caprica?

I noticed prequels are the trend the past few years.  Interesting.  Seems like we have also grown the hunger to know how one get’s to where they are today as well as where one is heading to. Fascinating.

So, it’s not just who have we become but what led us to become who we are as well as the people who influenced us along the way.

Whoosh!!! Bam! I loved the new way they get into warp speed.

I loved the new way they show how people are “transported” too . ah the little details which make a lot of difference.

This post was meant for yesterday. Thursday is for Random thoughts. Friday is for family and friends.  More later.