Random Thoughts while My wife is still awake!

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There’s so much beyond our “control”. We can “cultivate” an environment and space but gettign over attached to the results can be tiring.

It’s a lot of hard work this “move beyond” kind of thinking … the temptation is to get stuck or revert back to old ways of framing the questions and pursuing the answers.

What does “change” involve? how does “transformation” take place? What are we looking for? Who are we willing to open up to support the process? Fixed paths may seem to be the easier path. Uncertainty can be paralysing. Change is never comfortable …there’s a counter intuitive dimension to it – a seemingly contradictory approach to our own thinking? At least for a moment.

Interesting to hear about how the imperfections of our church is actually a source of encouragement. Sure, we don’t want to remain at a stage of brutal and plain honesty on our failings (which may lead to just giving excuses). genuine humility is conducive for growth towards maturity – with true passion and rare wisdom … we’re not there yet … looks like a long way to go. three steps foward with perhaps one step back, another few steps forward and a fumbling here and there. Learning to dance is tricky.

It’s always wonderful to see people included. It’s always sad when we’re losing touch with others disconnected. One person can’t make everyone belong.

Nice to get more comments the last few posts. totally unexpected. All encouraging.

I enjoyed teaching someone to “hum” today and then later learn some unfamiliar songs. It was a bonus when we managed to do some parts.

Had a long day this morning. Good time thinking through and talking through the support needed so we can be freer or others can be freer to explore the meaning of “priesthood of all believers” and “vocation”. Hope it works.

This continued with refining ideas of what community life might look like in BLC and experimenting more at a mental stage right now. I find myself benefitting a lot when I can “talk” through the ideas floating in my head. The conversations open up space to think deeper and be more creative and constructive.

More and more these days I’m learning to distinguish what are some urgent musings and what are more priority. There are times I think I’m really shallow, and other times I think there are sparks popping in my feeble brain. I’m learning to look at the “trees” better, but I still think it’s easy to get lost in the “forrest”.

Prayer – listening prayer … is so so important. It’s getting harder to communicate that in a world where it’s either neglected or cheapened. how does one share the importance of prayer? For now, I just pray – create space for conversations, listening, waiting, rest with an awareness of God. Sometimes, it looks routine – feels ritualistic, etc. But it’s a rhythm I’m growing to appreciate and cannot live without. Am I a prayer warrior saint or whatever? By no means! Like any human who needs to breath to live, I know I can’t do otherwise when it comes to prayer – rightly understood – even if it’s wasting time with the almighty.

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