In our wishes, small urgings, dreams and fantasies, we are given intimations of the way we are to go. It is our way alone and cannot be learned by reading books or listening to scholars or following others. We can learn our way only by taking seriously the sign that we see and the small voice that we hear. These we must treasure up in our hearts and ponder over. The code we are to decipher is written into our genes and sent out to us, as it were, from the core of our beings.
– Elizabeth O’Connor, The Eighth Day of Creation
May Chin and I were talking about who is more introvert or extrovert in the family, with special reference to the kids. Gareth will be happy reading books on his own, while Elysia will say bye to everyone when she leaves school – I mean she will go to other class rooms to say bye! And Ewan with his charming smile and inquisitive look – and a special alertness to the camera 🙂
Okay .. it’s premature to talk about specific careers or life partner choices … but there are interesting signs of the direction they are heading and the seeds of personality which will grow and blossom someday. I am curious of what God is doing in them. And as parents there are times when May Chin and I worry whether we are getting in the away, or concerned about how best we can best nurture them the best that we can. Of course, as a former youth pastor and frequent listener to parents of teenagers, I wonder how we will fair when that eventful day of "terror" comes … but I think we are getting ahead of ourselves here. One day at a time, step by step … for our "younglings" as well as for ourselves too …
it’s serious business – the sign reading, and small voice listening process. But we mustn’t stifle ourselves and especially our kids with overzealous parenting, or overanxious nurturing. How do we find the balance towards holistic maturing for them as well as ourselves? I don’t really have a formula or fool-proof equation. There’s loads of experimentation but underneath all that is a simply an attentiveness birthed from a growing confidence in our faith in the Father who loves us, and the guidance from reflecting on scriptural wisdom, and trust in the word of the Spirit who works more than mysteriously … but meaningfully especially in hindsight. Whether it’s for the children God has entrusted us with (which is a big responsibility), or our own selves (where we can not evade responsibility)!